Every day hundreds of eulogies are delivered by family members and friends who want to honor their loved one. Standing before a gathering of mourners to ‘say a few words’ as a tribute to one who has been loved and lost is an important thing to do – the best way to say that final farewell. But, for one reason or another, many of those tributes are off the cuff – from the heart, without doubt, but without much thinking or planning going into them. As well-intentioned as those may be, most miss the mark. They end up being more about the one giving the speech than about the deceased or they move into a maudlin display of emotion and tears.
A eulogy should be a work of art – art so artfully constructed that the one presenting the eulogy is proud of what he or she is doing and has confidence that the words spoken are from the heart but also capture the true essence of the one who is lying in state. A eulogy should be something that people comment about afterward as to how well it captured who the one they loved was. A eulogy should be something to be remembered, both you the giver and by those who hear.
Some people are able to write a eulogy for the first time and do it exactly right. But often even accomplished writers have difficulty when it comes to something so personal and important and public as the presentation of a eulogy. The funeral or memorial service is not the place to find out if you are one of those who can pull it off.
A second thing that should give the do-it-yourself eulogy writer pause is the incredibly brief time that exists between the death of a loved one and the eulogy presentation. Funerals or memorial services are traditionally held three days after a death. In the Jewish tradition it is just two days. With all the busyness of funeral preparation, the welcoming of out-of-town family, offering solace to those who mourn, and one’s own dealing with loss, there just is not enough time to write an adequate eulogy.
The writers at TheEulogyWriters.com have written nearly a thousand eulogies and understand what is needed. They have learned, through extensive experience, what ought to be included in a eulogy and what should be downplayed. They understand what tone the eulogy should take on in relation to the personality of the one who has passed on. They work on it throughout the night, if necessary, to have it to you by the following day so you needn’t be stressed.
Often, as eulogy writers, we find ourselves in the position of being life-savers. A person planned to write a eulogy for their loved one’s funeral but discovered, almost too late, that they couldn’t organize, in any coherent way, their jumbled thoughts and feelings. Or, time got away from them. They found themselves either distracted or over-extended for the past couple of days. Panic sets in because it is needed tomorrow! We can help. We have dozens of times. That’s what we do. That’s who we are.
It would be great if everyone who needed to present a eulogy could write it. The writing of a eulogy or memorial speech is often therapeutic and fosters the healing of one’s soul. But there is no shame in getting a little help. In fact, you can almost bet that any great eulogy you’ve ever heard was not composed by the one delivering it. A eulogy writer is somewhere there in the shadows helping, phrasing, giving confidence that the tribute he or she brings will truly honor the one you’ve all lost.
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